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Walking the dog — getting a new leash on
life.
We have a dog — a large dog. He's always been a rambunctious, overly
excitable, hard to handle, obedience school flunkee dog.  Top
it off with the fact that I'm not really a dog person. It's been a bad mix
from the beginning. My ex-husband wanted the kids to have a dog and promised
to help care for it.
Still a dog should be walked more than once or twice a week when Dad comes
to visit. But I've resented the task because it has been more of dog dragging
person than walk. The
kids don't have the strength to control him at all. And if he runs free
without any guidance, he just goes wild and gets into all sorts of trouble.
Obedience school recommended a choke collar — something that really goes
against my grain. But I tried it. The fact that he was being half
choked, did nothing to slow him down. Seemed the harder I pulled back the
harder he pulled forward. We tried all the training routines of trying to
turn around when he pulls one way. Nothing worked. Someone told me
that they have new choke collars with studs to bite into the dog — no way
will I try that inhumane treatment. But then my cousin came to visit me
and told me of a collar called a "Gentle Leader" fits around the snout and
back of the head. The dog pulls forward, the head gets turned gently sideways
(You never jerk on the leash, just hold firmly.) and since a dog follows his nose...
Within minutes the dog is walking gently beside me. I can now hold
the leash with one finger and walk the dog. Wow, incredible! Even
better, now the kids can walk the dog!
The brochure that comes with the leash tells how it works with the nature of the
dog. Regular dog collars feed into a dog's natural tendency to pull against it.
(Think of sled dogs.)
So what does all this have to do with parenting? Well, think about it....
When your child (particularly teen) wants to pull forward away from you, is your
parenting style a choke collar or a "Gentle Leader"? How can we work with
the natural tendancies of our children to guide gently and not choke or let them
run wild?
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